Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
smell my finger.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
