I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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