Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
This house was built for laser tag.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
