I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Someone shattered a urinal.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
