I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Text me some of your sweat
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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