do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
