Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
She even gives head with a lisp.
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she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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