So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize