I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Randomize