don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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