Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
