doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize