Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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