4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize