NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
