No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize