no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
