Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize