i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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