We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
