Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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