Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
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