it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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