O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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