Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
