Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
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