i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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