how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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