All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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