i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize
