I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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