I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
The struggles of a small town man whore
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
