Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I just found puke in my bra..
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
