Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
