he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
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