you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
