you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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