I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Less talking, more tequila
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize