He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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