google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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