Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Randomize
