Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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