I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
