dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
