first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
