: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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