The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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