her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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