Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
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i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
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Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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