Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
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