i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
sex in a hospital.. check
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
